5 Top Things About My Indiana Trip

I’ve completed my delightful mini-trek to southwest Indiana, and here’s what I learned:
1) If you’re not in the mood for niceness, don’t come here. Almost everybody who walks by you on the street or even in a car is moved to wave. After a while, you get used to it and even like it.
2) Life starts at 8 a.m. Thank God I was awake every morning before that hour, because otherwise I’d have been startled out of my sleep by the sounds of power mowers, chain saws, and mega hammers.
3) Dairy Queen is the only chain fast-food place worth going off your diet for. I visited, ecstatically, the one in Mount Vernon, Indiana, and thought I saw the Virgin on the face of a dilly bar. Why New York City can’t import a few DQ franchises is a mystery sufficient to make me believe in McDonald’s-driven conspiracy theories.
4) Tomatoes taste better out here. Last night, I had the good fortune to sample a salad composed mostly of purple and yellow heirlooms picked that day from the host’s garden. The only better tomatoes I’ve ever eaten were in Greece.
5) Talking about the weather is an art form, and, if you’re not a veteran, don’t even bother. If you can’t parse the complexities of “dew point” and “tornado warning,” you’re immediately exposed as a foreigner.

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